having such a tough time with feeling good and having people think im vain. its rather disgusting actually, is there an in between? whats so wrong with feeling confident? people think of you as snobby or conceited. its taken me so long to finally be able to be okay with my appearance and barely building up my confidence. just barely. and now i'm being shot down, and i dont understand why im taking it in the wrong way, or why it even bothers me. im not the way i used to be in high school- when i was a little stuck up and didnt give a shit about what anyone had to say about me. now i'm feeling like the older i get the more i give a shit about people who dont even have the slightest clue about who i am. who i really am. what i feel inside, what im going through. these constant battles I'm facing day in and day out, they take their toll sometimes, and honestly, i dont know how much longer i can keep fighting them. i wish i could express this out loud, especially to my mother. I feel like im being pulled in both directions.
Have a good one, Eligh! And congrats, Jessica! Baby on zee way ;) So, today was heaps nice, I finally got the monkey off my back. It felt gr...